Standing Still

And the days
Are slipping away
Tell me when did time go so fast?
And still so slow
Oh I know
Our whole lives are before us
But who knows?
There just may be a moment
When Time stands still

Looking at you
Is tugging me gently
Tell me when have I loved like this?
And still I know
Oh I know
That this love will grow deeper
There may just be a moment
When Time stands still

I'm swept away
By the magnitude
Tell me you're never letting me go
Now that I know
Oh I know
That I will always be yours
That just may be the moment
When Time stands still

Known Me

Song of the week: Known by Audrey Assad. A beautiful, heartfelt song of worship to Christ. I think it is mah-va-lous. I'm posting a link to the song, so give it a listen. The lyrics are shown on the video {an added bonus}. Audrey's music is heavy on the piano, something that I love, and her voice is clear and soulful. The entire album is a breath of fresh air. I have been soaking it in this week, and it has been a wonderful listening experience.

Catching Moodrops

With such a whimsical title, I can't help but be swept off my feet. Catching Moondrops is the third book in a trilogy written by Jennifer Valent, and I am so excited to have my hands on the final installment. I love the way the book titles roll off my tongue: Fireflies in December, Cottonwood Whispers, Catching Moondrops.

As of late, I have not had the time for reading, but since I am now in possession of this new book, I don't know that I can neglect such a tantalizing treat. A nice hot cup of tea, cuddly blanket, and a comfy recliner sound positively inviting to me now. Ahhhhh...such pleasures are the stuff of daydreams.

Not Falling In

I didn't think my heart was big enough to hold you
The way I am holding you right now
I thought that when I said 'I love you'
It would express all I wanted to say

But words are empty to me now
They don't quite mean what I feel
If I could find the words to say
I would fill the empty shades of grey

I would paint you a rainbow
With all the vibrant colors of my thoughts
They would be a prism of light for you
To dazzle and sparkle and shine

I am not falling in love with you
I chose to love you as you are
You have become precious to me
I wouldn't change you for the world

No, I am not falling in.
What started as a fancy,
Or perhaps a feeling,
Has changed.

It took me deeper.
It took me higher.
Further up
And further in.

Kaleidoscope

This was written after my journey to India in the spring of 2009. How I miss Bangalore, with it's vibrant bursts of color, scents of spices, seas of people, and oh, the children. Especially the children.

Peering through the handmade kaleidoscope, my eyes were dazzled by the fragments of light and bright colors. "Its beautiful," I told Jennifer. Her dark, expressive eyes danced with pleasure as I complimented her creative designs that covered the exterior of the tube. I smiled, thinking how appropriate our VBS craft turned out to be. Like Jennifer's kaleidoscope, a myriad of experiences were bombarding my senses, and I was trying to soak all of them in.

The seven days spent in Bangalore flew by, and now I am home, picking up the pieces. The memories are still fresh on my mind. Like the time we spent at Pastor Charles' with his two daughters and the precious orphans in their care. Seeing the eagerness in their upturned faces as we interacted with them, as we got to know them, and took interest in them personally during the short time we had. At the end of the first day, our VBS team gathered around the young children and prayed blessings over them. On day two, as we prepared to leave, the orphans, Pastor Charles, his wife Alice, and their two girls surrounded our small group and began to pray over us. To hear their young voices crying out to God in their native tongue is a memory that I will always treasure. When we said our goodbyes, I was surprised to find my face wet with tears - glancing up, I saw that others were crying as well. I embraced the children for the last time, unwilling to leave them behind.

I was reminded of what an awesome God we serve. The Spirit of Christ resides in the hearts of all who are His. His love binds us, unites us, across oceans and cultures. I was struck by the contagious joy that radiated from the hearts of the orphaned children. It spilled out of their smiles and lit up their countenances. They were loved. These orphans have hope - and that was a beautiful thing to see.

The Dance

Pressures pressing tightly
Breathe in, breathe out
The days are running out
Don't fall apart

I will become yours to hold
Draw me closer
I want to be taken in
Take me away

I will wait, I will prepare
You will do the same
Take it easy, take it slow
Soon I shall share your name

Time is like a dance
Sometimes fast
Sometimes slow
It is enough for me to know
That I will dance with you
For all of time.

Brilliance

I could never number the stars,
But I never tire of staring at them.
They seem so bright, and I feel so small.
I cannot comprehend it all.
I know He placed them each in space
The glittering orbs that twinkle and shine
And somehow seeing them up above
Reminds me of His limitless love.
And that to me is wonderful.

Consider

"To have found God and
still to pursue Him is the soul's paradox of
love, scorned indeed by the too
easily satisfied religionist, but justified
in happy experience by the
children of the burning heart."

- A.W. Tozer
{1897-1963} The Pursuit of God, pp.
14-15

I happened across this quote from A.W. Tozer, and it resonated with me. I especially like the refernce to 'children of the burning heart.' It reflects the passion that I believe should mark every follower of Christ. His Spirit in us spurs us on to the greatest happiness: a true relationship with Christ Himself. How amazingly wonderful. How awesomely marvelous. This indeed is where the deepest passion lies. We were made to be one with Jesus. We are the children of the burning heart.

Million Pieces

Every day I see the pain

Every day I hear the cries

It's so hard to just ignore

The silent pleas for something more

I hear the stories, I see the tears;

Whispered secrets, untold fears

I try to tell them of the hope You give

But I can't make them see the truth.

Jesus, please take this broken heart

The pain inside is tearing me apart

Take the fragments, make them whole

Heal the wounds deep in my soul

And give me eyes to see what's true

Jesus, hold me close to You.

I don't always understand

Your sovereign will and guiding hand

But I believe that Your love conquers all

And You will bring beauty from pain

Hope came shining in the darkness

Truth can pierce the empty soul

Trust is strengthened by true love

Fears vanish as the light comes pouring in

I start to see small glimpses of Your plan

You're changing lives but You're also changing me.

**********************************************

I wrote this piece several years back, after my first trip overseas to Russia. It resonated with me then, and I thought it was neat to look back to hindsight and bring back memories...

image source

Beating Heart

The strength of your arms
Surrounding me
Gives me security
Your warm embraces
Comfort me
Stop my shivers of cold
And I know
That you will be here for me
I am sure
That you will be my protector
You made me a promise
And I gave you my word
That we will be true
I will always love you.

Precious Little Time

Changes hover over my horizon. And I have been swept away by change. Of course, I have embraced every moment, but these changes mean that I am sacrificing in other areas. Such as...this blog, for instance. For now, whomever my readers may be, you must be content with the sporadic posts as they appear in scattered bits and pieces.

Inspiration comes and goes, I have found. I cannot conjure it up. These musings may not be particularly interesting, but the lack of inspired writing as of late could be chalked up to the fact that my brain has been occupied elsewhere for the past few months. Truth be told, I have been rather scatterbrained.

So bear with me, please. I hope that I will have something to say that will be of more interest, but that is not forthcoming right now. And since I have nothing further to say, I will say nothing more.

Twenty four hours in a day
Time that we are given
We are not guaranteed a breath
At any moment, it could end

So hold tight the ones you love
Embrace each and every morning
Live life while you have the chance
Don't waste another day

Pour yourself out, give it away
While you have the time to give
Don't hold back, have no reserves
For our time here is not lasting

Christ gave everything for you
That you might live
This is your time, and your place
Don't waste another day.

More Than a Feeling

Is love a fancy or a feeling? So asks Marianne in Jane Austen's novel Sense and Sensibility. I believe that it is much more, over and beyond a mere fancy and that it runs deeper than a feeling. Feelings are based in emotions, and are subject to change. Moods come and go, but authentic love remains constant. True love is no fancy, and does not rest in the realm of thought.

How to describe it? I am almost at a loss. What to say when words are not enough? To say that love is a commitment would be true, but there is more to it than that. Honestly, the word love is used rather flippantly in the English language, and has lost meaning over time. We live in a culture where love has become casual, and in regard to relationships, can be cast about with little or no commitment.

I adore the movie Princess Bride. It is a tale about 'true love,' and while it is a sarcastic fairy tale, the film both mocks the idea of 'happily ever after' and condones it all at once. How many people can actually say that their love is like the true love between Wesley and Buttercup? True love has become something like a myth, only found in the fairy tales and Jane Austen novels, but is not to be expected in reality.

In short, it has become a rare thing to witness anyone who is truly in love. It is uncommon to see a healthy relationship in which a husband cherishes his wife, or where a wife honors her husband. If you listen to pop culture songs, you will pick up on a trend of broken hearts, fragmented relationships, and shattered dreams. Today's generation has become disillusioned.

But there is always hope. Thank God for that. There has always been a remnant, and so long as there are Christ followers, reflecting the light of the Son, then there will be an environment for real love to flourish. Seek ye first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you. Those who put Christ first have a perfect example of true love. And Scripture outlines the surest path to a healthy relationship between husbands and wives.

Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. ²³For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and he is the saviour of the body. ²⁴Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. ²⁵Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it... {Ephesians 5:22-25}

I have been blessed beyond measure and have been walking on cloud nine because God brought someone into my life. I feel as though I cannot deserve the love that God lavishes on me, or the love that my fiance shows towards me. To say that I am happy falls short. I must say that what I am experiencing is sweeter and more beautiful than anything I have hitherto known or thought possible. I tell my fiance that "God put you in my way." Just when I think that I cannot love him any more, I find that I treasure him increasingly, and that my regard for him deepens daily. What kind of love is this? I believe that it is because we love Christ that we can love each other in this way. I have no other explanation. This love is not a passing fancy nor a temporary feeling. It is real.

And this post turned out to be longer than I originally intended it to be. These thoughts have been on my mind, and I felt compelled to share them. There is always hope.

image source

To Be With You

Bright beams of headlights
Pass me by, they fade and blur
But I am miles from here
My thoughts are my own

Distance separates me now
Time just ticks on by
But I know you're thinking of me
Just as I am thinking of you

Just to be near you
Is enough
To know you're close
Is all that I need
Your hand in mine
Gives me security
All I want now
Is to be near you

You bring out a side of me
That I didn't know I had
Even in silence
We speak without words

Just to be near you
Is enough
To know you're close
Is all that I need
Your hand in mine
Gives me security
All I want now
Is to be near you

Blurred lights, out of focus
Passing me by, jarring me
Headlights bring me back
Back to where I started

Inspiration

I discovered Polyvore...and after messing around for a bit, I came out with very first 'set.' I entitled it: inspiration. It was rather fun to pick and choose whatever I wanted, and very easy to compose this collage. I think I might be hooked...

Meese, Moose, and Dr. Seuss

Language is a funny thing. My cousin Hayato tells me that English is difficult, and I have to agree with him. For instance, take the word moose. When moose is plural, it remains the same. More than one moose are still moose in proper English. Goose, however, is another matter entirely. Multiple goose are geese. If that isn't confusing enough, we have the mongooses. A singular mongoose is a mongoose, but when we are talking about more than one, the word becomes mongooses.

A moose is a moose.
There are no mooses or meese.
A goose is a goose.
There are no gooses, just geese.
But a mongoose is a mongoose -
There are no mongeese.
Only mongooses.
And I feel like Dr. Seuss.

Nonsensical. Absurd. But this is true. In order to speak correctly, we must observe that the moose, geese, and mongooses are much nicer than plain old moose, goose, and mongoose. Just a bit of useful information that I felt like sharing...

Fireflowers 花火

Tonight was magical. After I got off of work, I spent the evening with wonderfully amazing people, whom I love and cherish. God painted a cotton candy sunset in the sky. When theit grew dark and the lights dimmed, I witnessed a spectacular display. My eyes beheld willow-tree fireflowers that fell like stardust from the night sky. With each successive explosion came a new burst of light, a different pattern on the canvas of the sky. I was physically tired, and almost drifted off to dreamland as I gazed upwards.

The best part? This is just the beginning. Fireflower displays are starting to come into a full swing. Oh, how I love summer! May the magic never end... I am slipping into sleep even as I write this. Sleep is a welcome friend to me now. I think I will embrace it.

So Sweet

I love words. Language is a wonderful thing, and I see it as a challenge to find the perfect words to describe my thoughts and feelings. A friend of mine recently lent me a book that she thought I would enjoy. In her own words:

I loved the language of this story. Simply, I loved the way he put words together. As a fellow lover of words, I expect you will love it too...

The book is entitled The Sweetness at the Bottom of the Pie, and that is quite a mouthful. I had only laid eyes on the first few pages before I knew that I was going to love soaking in this book. I sunk my teeth into a scrumptious, delightful treasure. I have been reading it out loud to my sister, and the two of us are immensely enjoying the wonderfully written tale. I love the way that the words roll off my tongue.

I never knew that books could taste this delicious. This is a must read for philologists. If you love words, you will adore this book. Sweetness is a delectable treat of literature that does not rely on dialogue to support it's vivid cast of characters.

Coming Down from the Clouds

And after an extremely long hiatus, I have returned home once more. My time in Okinawa was wonderful, subarashii, but it feels good to be back where I belong. I love to travel, and my sense of adventure is always up for something new, but it is nice to rest in a place that I know is truly my own. Where things are familiar once more. Where the trees stand still.

I took nearly 500 pictures during my stay, and considering that I was in country for just about 3 weeks, this should not be shocking news. For the sake of my blog, I chose my favorite shots and posted them here. In pictures, here is a glimpse of Okinawa through my eyes...

Short Eternity

Please don't
Say goodbye to me tonight
Just say
Till I see you again
'Cause goodbye sounds so final

They say
Distance makes the heart grow fonder
I say
My heart's already fond
I just might love you too much

// Promise me
That you'll look at the starry sky
Gaze up high
And when you find the brightest star
Send me a greeting from where you are
I promise you that I'll do the same //

To me
It seems like a short eternity
Just like
An age without you here
I can't wait to say hullo again

// Promise me
That you'll look at the starry sky
Gaze up high
And when you find the brightest star
Send me a greeting from where you are
I promise you that I'll do the same //

image source

You and Me

Song of the week: another Lifehouse number. No surprise there, huh? I can't seem to get this one out of my head. I have no desire to try to stop singing it. So I'm inviting you to enjoy this song with me. We can sing it together. You and Me.

Of Mary Poppins and Handbags...

And so I bought my first ever tote. I wasn't exactly wild about it, but the 'Liberty of London for Target' tote pictured above is now in my possession. I wanted a cuter carry-on that I could stuff my stuff in, and the 'Liberty' tote fit my needs. It also helped that it happened to be on clearance. And it is quite capacious in size, with plenty of space for my various articles. I was joking with a friend of mine, saying that it is my very own Mary Poppins carpetbag, a la slightly more modern. I could probably fit a baby elephant inside, if I wanted to try. I would be the type of person to walk around with an elephant in her bag as opposed to a toy Yorkie or Chihuahua...

At this point, I believe that I am all set to go off. I will be taking a hiatus from the blogging, though I may post pictures from Japan. I do not expect that June will boast many blog posts. I hate saying goodbye to people, so instead I will say farewell. Mata ashte, tomadachi.

Firefly

It was a magical night. I can now say that it is officially summer, because I saw with my very own eyes the first of the fireflies. My childlike sense of wonder has always been fascinated with the ethereal light that these tiny bugs produce. On and off, their twinkling lights dance through the darkness.

I thought about the way that light contrasts with darkness. How darkness is the absence of light. And how the tiniest lightning bug flicker can draw my attention when it pierces through the darkness. Then I began to think about the people in my life who have been a light to me when all other lights have gone out. How Christ is the greatest Light, the Light of the world who entered the darkness to give us the true light. And how His followers shine just like the fireflies. We are a light in dark places, that penetrate through the despair and show hope to those who have none.

So I concluded that I am a firefly. Christ's firefly. Figuratively speaking, of course. And I love to shine brightly for Him.

image source

Raindancer

Yesterday I spent an entire day walking amidst beautiful lush green paths in a dense forest. Surrounded by green, above and beside me, I felt as though I were drinking in a richness. The air got heavier as the day progressed, and rainclouds ushered in, threatening to open up their bounty. I love the smell of rain, when the earth prepares to receive a thorough soaking. When I set out on the trail, I had no idea what would lie in store for me. Yet I was up for an adventure.

I was two thirds of the way to the end of the wooded trail when I first began to hear the raindrops. Turning my face upwards, I could see the tiny droplets falling from the treetops and descending to the ground. Then I felt them. First one, then two, and then a third drop. Cold on my skin. It wasn't long before the heavens released the rain in quicker succession. Soon, I and those around me found ourselves drenched. I cannot remember the last time I got caught in a torrential downpour. Even the trees could not shield us from the waters that cascaded down upon us.

The sound of the steady downpour was soothing. Like a soft symphony. And I danced like a child. I spun. I soaked it in. And it was beautiful.

image source

My Special Flower

Whispers

Whisper carried on the wings of the wind
Blowing softly through my hair
Caught on the breeze, touching me lightly
I hear Your voice - speak to me
I am listening

Swelling ocean crashing against the shore
Lapping waves over my toes
Chilling water, washing over my skin
I see the wonder - show me
I am watching

Glittering stars in the heavens above
Shining brighter than diamonds
Capture my attention, fixate my gaze
I am so small - tell me
I am Yours

All around me I sense that You are here
Lord of the earth and the sky
What is man, that You are mindful of him?
Who am I - You say
You are mine.

image source

Butterfly

Memories in a bottle
Come floating over me
Trying to catch them all
Is like chasing butterflies
I can hold but a few at a time
Each one is precious
But some float away
From my grasp
And I am left clutching air
Nothing there.

But the memory of you
Is clear
I can see in vivid detail
If memories are butterflies
Than you are more beautiful
And you soar the highest
And you are the one that I treasure
But I would rather have you
Than a memory.

...............................................................

A reflective piece that I jotted down while contemplating memories. The words seemed to write themselves, and I was merely trying to catch them on paper before they disappeared altogether.

Dreamer...

Uhm, yes, I am a dreamer. I love this dress. Someone needs to tell me to get my head out of the clouds, because I am in danger of floating away. It is so beautiful, and I love beautiful things. Goodness...

Morning Walk

I took another ramble today, and snatched my camera as I headed out the door. The fresh rainfall had collected on the earth, making brilliant orbs that sparkled like glass. They were just sitting there, waiting for me to find them. I do so love rainy days. The lighting brings out different hues, and I enjoy capturing the beauty with my little camera. Simple pleasures...

Something Sacred

I locked me away
And buried the key
In a place that only I knew
Until you came to me
And you shook my world
Now everything is changing

Its my sacred trust
My gift to you
If I open the door and give you the key
I am believing that you will stay

Guard my heart
Protect my soul
'Cause this trust is sacred
Now I'm letting you in
Into the depths of me
Christ alone knows me better than you do

When I search your eyes
I see an honest reflection
Of the man that you are
Honest and real
Gentle and strong
I know I can rest securely in you

Something sacred
This trust that we share
We opened our doors and we hold the keys
Knowing that we both will stay...

............................................................................

Love is more than a fancy or a feeling. It is a promise, a commitment, and is held together by a strong bond of trust. This trust is something sacred, and should be valued. Bits and pieces of my reflections; just fragments, really.

Easier To Be ... Me

Yup. Yet another Lifehouse song. Will I ever tire of posting and listening to this incredibly gifted group? Apparently not. 'Easier To Be' is my song of the week, and I wanted to share it. I have come to the conclusion that I cannot contain my happiness, because it is bursting out of me. I randomly break out into smiles. This life that we have should be lived to the full, and I for one intend to live it up. For me, each waking moment is an opportunity, and every day has prospects of being a grand adventure. I am wide-eyed and mystified.

At times, I do feel somewhat like a cock-eyed optimist. Particularly when I look around me and see images of the war-torn countries, lands stricken by earthquakes and the chaos of America's economy. I don't dabble in politics much, but even I can see the that my country's predicament is a serious one. And my heart is heavy for the hurting people. It breaks for the starving abandoned children. So my optimism is tempered by reality. But when I take the time to consider, it is all real. My joy and the pain. They co-exist.

I look forward to the day when there will be no more sorrows. When the mourning is turned into dancing. When everything is as it should be. Until that time, I will hold fast to hope. Because He lives, there is always hope.

Those Rainy Days

Rainy days have a unique beauty of their own. The subdued lighting produces a different sort of color palette, and I couldn't resist snapping a few photographs today. Sparkling raindrops on beautiful and delicate flowers are so lovely. The droplets are like tiny orbs of resplendent glass.

I haven't much else to say aside from this short entry. And so I will sign off until I have something interesting to share.